I AM STILL PETRIFIED!
It takes me so many times, to video each one. I start talking, and hate the way I look, or don't think I am being specific enough, so I stop and then have to restart!
1 Year ago, I would never have believed you if you told me I would making videos for YouTube! Not a chance! I envied everyone who could do it, but had absolutely no faith in myself !
So, for about 6 weeks, I have been recording myself on video. Speaking about anything, really random stuff, just waffling on, to myself, about my day or about the chickens. I deleted the video afterwards, they weren't meant to be seen by anyone else, it was just so I could get used to seeing myself on camera, get used to speaking ( I say UMMM alot ! ) and make sure that I don't ramble on too much, and go off point! I have a real habit, even when talking to my mum on phone to go completely off subject! I wanted to make sure that I was able to keep to the point, and get my message across.
When I felt more confident with myself, even though I definitely have a way to go yet, as I still sound so nervous, I then posted my first video! I was so nervous, literally filled with Anxiety, but I knew I needed to step outside my very close-knit comfort zone, and grow. Comfort zones are incredibly safe places and I love mine, with my anxiety I really struggle to do things that I just don't feel comfortable with, and fills me stress. I get headaches, and can't concentrate on anything else. My recovery journey has really helped me find coping strategies, and now I can calm myself down using meditation, then I do the video straight after. It really helps me to get into the right mindset.
I have decided that I want to do a new video each week, I am planning on doing 1 every Monday, which will be discussing everything I got up to last week, and how I have coped, almost like a mental health diary I suppose. The main point of The Mother Hen Mission, is that I want to show that I am a real person, suffering with Anxiety, whilst being a mum and working from home. So, by doing the videos I can really explain my point and helps others.
If you need any help on starting your recovery journey then head to SHOP to see what downloads would suit you best for the position you are in right now